EOTAS: Why the Government must listen to those with lived experience

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Until recently, I’ll admit, I didn’t know very much about Education Otherwise Than At School (EOTAS). I knew it wasn’t a lifestyle choice, that EOTAS is not something families “pick” like choosing a handbag, but I didn’t truly understand why some parents advocate so fiercely for it for their child or young person.

However, since the government launched its consultation on EOTAS, I’ve had the privilege of leading two parent/carer focus groups, one for the Down’s Syndrome Association (DSA) and one for ALLFIE. I also facilitated SNJ’s recent webinar on EOTAS with a panel of experts. Listening to families speak openly, sometimes painfully, about their experiences has fundamentally shifted my understanding of what EOTAS is, and why it matters.

And it has made one thing absolutely clear: If the government wants to reform EOTAS, it must start by listening, and I mean REALLY listening, to the families whose children’s lives are shaped by it to ensure that they do not create further harm.

EOTAS is not a choice. It is what happens after crisis

In the Down’s Syndrome Association’s EOTAS focus group, families consistently described to me how EOTAS was not a freely chosen alternative, but the point they reached only after every other form of provision had failed to meet their child’s needs. Parents explained that their experiences and EOTAS packages varied widely, yet they all shared a common trajectory: situations had escalated to crisis before EOTAS was finally agreed, and even then the arrangements could still feel fragile.

A central message was that early support is only meaningful if it is the right support. Support in schools must be timely, appropriate, and responsive to the child’s actual individually assessed needs. Families emphasised that attempts to time‑limit EOTAS or focus primarily on reintegration, overlook the reasons EOTAS becomes necessary in the first place. Their children had experienced distress, trauma, or complete dysregulation in previous settings, and EOTAS was the only provision that kept them safe, able to learn, and emotionally stable.

Parents also stressed the seriousness of the stakes. Some described situations where, without the protections offered by current law and their legal rights, their child’s wellbeing, or even their life, would have been at risk. These are not the kind of considerations policy usually takes into account; but they are real, lived experiences that must guide any reform of EOTAS or wider SEND provision.

Why This Matters for the Government Consultation

The government’s consultation on EOTAS closes on 18 September. While formal consultations are important, they are not enough.

DfE officials writing policy need to do more than read written submissions. Reading people’s stories can allow distance, it can sanitise trauma and it can turn lived experience into bullet points.

Officials and Ministers need to sit with families who has EOTAS. They need to hear the stories and to feel them as I have done in the sessions I have facilitated. They need to understand what it feels like when your child is suffering in school and no one notices – or worse, when they notice but nothing changes.

This is exactly why meaningful engagement with those with lived experience (not just representative organisations) matters.

My daughter’s story: How quickly things can change

Listening to parents talk about distress and trauma brought back memories of my own daughter’s Year 5, what I would describe as the worst year of her entire education.

There was not just one cause, there were multiple things happening all at once:

the school shifting its focus to academic attainment ahead of Year 6 SATs
a harder curriculum
the gap between her and her peers widening, meaning increasing isolation from friends
a revolving door of teachers — one on maternity leave, replaced by job‑sharing deputy heads, then replaced again by a teacher returning from maternity leave
five different teaching assistants, including one she was genuinely frightened of.

For the first time ever, she started saying she didn’t want to go to school. She did not want to put her uniform on in the mornings. She put her head down on the table and refused to work. She crawled under desks. She locked herself in toilet cubicles to avoid the classroom. I lost count of the number of times I raised her distress with her teachers. I also lost count of the number of “walks of shame” across the playground, summoned yet again to hear how she wasn’t behaving or wasn’t engaging in lessons.

It all came to a head when the SENCO found me crying in the playground after yet another incident (and I am a parent that does not cry in school!). She took me inside and asked what was wrong. Eventually it was escalated to the Head, who had no idea I had been raising concerns for two terms. She fortunately acted immediately, and one of her decisions was to take my daughter out of the classroom every afternoon for nurture sessions. As a fierce advocate for inclusion, I initially resisted. I didn’t want her separated from her peers. But the school persuaded me this was what she needed to heal, to rebuild trust, and to rediscover her love of learning. I trusted them. And it worked.

Now, listening to other parents, I realise how easily things could have gone the other way. How quickly distress can become trauma. How easily a child or young person can disengage completely due to multiple factors out of their control, if no one intervenes in time.

Why Nurture matters

Nurture programmes (often called nurture groups) are a well‑established, evidence‑based intervention created by educational psychologists to support children whose emotional wellbeing is affecting their ability to learn. They are small, structured groups within a school, usually led by trained staff, providing a calm, predictable environment where relationships, routine and emotional safety come first.

The approach is based on attachment theory and child development: children learn best when they feel secure, understood, and connected. The aim is to rebuild the foundations that make learning possible. When done well, nurture programmes help children regulate, reconnect, and gradually reintegrate into the classroom with renewed confidence. This was certainly our experience, as my daughter was able to fully return into the classroom by the end of term, and had a brilliant Year 6, finishing primary school on a high.

Nurture programmes offer trauma‑informed practice in action, and they can prevent children from reaching the point where EOTAS becomes the only viable option. However – to be clear – nurture programmes alone will not make mainstream schools more inclusive. They can be an important programme of work, but the DfE needs to listen to families to understand how and why issues arise that cause children to experience trauma and crisis in the first place.

If the Government wants fewer children in EOTAS, here’s what must change

The government has said it wants to more children with SEND to be educated in mainstream classrooms. If they are serious about reducing the number of pupils relying on EOTAS over time then they need to demonstrate that they are serious about preventing trauma in the first place.

That means:

schools must become more inclusive for ALL children in the first place, recognising how current curriculum, school buildings, timetables, uniforms and more can be challenging for many children
teachers and support staff must be trained to recognise distress early
school leaders must listen to parents when they are raising concerns
schools must understand how quickly a change in circumstances can tip a child or young person into crisis
behaviour changes must be investigated through a trauma‑informed lens
schools must have the expertise and resources to act quickly
nurture and relational practice must be embedded, not optional.

My daughter went overnight from loving school to not wanting to go. Overnight. That is how fast things can and do change for some children.

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For children already in EOTAS programmes

Any reintegration (if at all possible) must be safe, slow, and only if and when the child is ready. From the families I’ve listened to in recent weeks, one message is loud and clear: reintegration can be dangerous if not managed properly.

Some children may never be able to return to a formal setting. Others may be able to return, but only with careful planning, specialist support, and a genuine understanding of their trauma.

We were lucky. My daughter was supported before she disengaged from education completely. Many families are not so fortunate, and their child or young person may need years of nurture, care and support before they can re-engage with formal education in person. And for many others, this may never be the end goal.

The Government must listen to families

If the DfE wants to create policy that protects children and enables a safe and nurturing education, it must listen to the people who know them best: their families. This way they will understand the reasons why families have to resort to EOTAS provision, and only then will they understand what is needed to make all schools safe spaces to learn for all children.

The formal EOTAS consultation closes on 18 September. Please respond if you can.

And to the officials drafting the reforms: read the submissions, of course, but please also find ways to sit down with families, to hear their stories, understand their fear, their exhaustion, and their hope.

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About
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Sharon Smith

Co-Director at Special Needs Jungle Ltd

Sharon Smith is a co-director for Special Needs Jungle and is the mother of a young lady who has Down's syndrome. Sharon undertook doctoral research at the University of Birmingham, exploring inclusion with parents of disabled children. Following successful completion of her PhD in 2024, Sharon can now call herself Dr Smith, but rarely does. Her research interests include risk/vulnerability, belonging, co-production, inclusion and philosophy of education.